Why should the Deputy Prime Minister, or anyone else in government, have to treat the civil service like remedial students at a primary school? If their work is piss-poor, why should ‘the modern workplace’ still have to make them feel positive about themselves? What should a government minister say to an official who turns in sub-standard work? ‘Jolly good. Take some more time off. Have a raise’? Is ‘the modern workplace’ the same as a safe space? Or a crèche?